Dating and Job hunting

You feel comfortable in your relationship/job. You think maybe this is the one. You did it! How did you get so lucky? You picked yourself off the market. And you are not looking forward to getting back in the game anytime soon.

After months or years, that moment arrives when the relationship/job does not seem to be working anymore. Something has changed and you stop seeing yourself in this relationship/job long term.

2020 was a defining year for the world. Like many others, I found myself in the lookout for a new job. And that made me realize how similar job hunting and dating are.

1) There are plenty more fish in the sea

A quick search on the dating/job search app makes you believe that there are countless options out there. And you were crazy to feel this was going to be so hard. Guess what? Very soon, reality bursts your bubble and you find yourself allergic to most of the fish and the sea appears to be toxic.

2) Chemistry

There need not always be an instant spark. But there has to be some level of attraction to kindle an interest. Sometimes you do not find that connection even with the coolest people/jobs. That does not mean something is wrong with you. It is just not the right fit. After weeks and months of right swiping/applying, no promising options emerge.

3) Ghosting

Sometimes, your luck shines a little bit. A promising romantic/professional option shows up. You chat, email, call, and video call for weeks and months. Things seem to be catching pace. There is connection and communication. Just when you dream of removing your single/open to work status from social media, the dreadful happens. You stop getting their replies. The exciting back and forth is taken over by a dead silence. Unfortunately, you got ghosted my friend and I am so sorry for your loss.

4) Break

You get exhausted by series of rejections and miscommunication. The ones that show interest in you just aren’t right for you. That’s when you decide to take a break from this fruitless rigmarole. You realize that being single isn’t that bad. Your current job or joblessness isn’t that bad either. You read some blogs and books. You take some courses. You talk to your friends and professional network for guidance. You work on self-improvement.

5) Sealing the Deal

One day, you find that person/job. If you are lucky, they are perfect for you in every way. If not perfect, they are good enough for now. You enter into this new relationship/job with hope and commitment in mind. After all, the long wait finally resulted in something worthwhile. The nerves of the new relationship/job get you. You are overwhelmed and experiencing mixed emotions. Life feels exciting again. You feel happy. You are not sure how long it will last. But you choose to bask in the glory of the new relationship/job and not overthink it just for a moment.

Until one day, history repeats itself.